I've got 99 problems, but that gnat thing's solved...

Summers in the South are hard for people whose hearts were raised in the Plains. In Nebraska, the only people who have bugs inside their homes are dirty people. In the South, bugs come with the picture window...and the fruit...and the vegetables...and my compost. So, I decided to take on the growing gnat problem with some chemical and toxin-free remedies. My solution: First, carnivorous plants. Yeah for more plants! Second, a bottle, banana, and soapy-water-with-funnel-entrance recommended by Owen. Wish us luck!

1. Venus fly traps. I love them. They need good drainage and lots of sun. And plenty of purified water courtesy of the plastic jug that sits on my stoop.

2. A ripe banana begins the gnat-jar-trap project.

3. Courtesy of British apricots, a lovely brown beer bottle will protect guests' eyes from the carnage inside the gnat trap.

4. Soapy water+banana in beer bottle...one more step to go!

5. Make a funnel so the gnats can get in but not out. Buh-bye, gnat monsters. Hello, clean house.